It started not too bad but by Tuesday everything went downhill.
I got a call from my husband saying that he had wrecked his road grader. He was/is okay but it was a scary ordeal. The steering stopped working and in a matter of 10 seconds he was in a ditch. He was going 30 mph.
It's unnerving.
He was in this!!!
He fell right on a wooden fence post. If it had been a steel one, he wouldn't be here. *deep breath*
This fence happens to have all wooden posts but as I was driving on Saturday I noticed that A LOT, in fact I'd say MOST, fences have more steel posts than wooden.
Tuesday is also the day we met with our contractors for our addition and foundation construction. For one contractor, it was the final meeting before they begin. The other contractor is just starting on the planning.
By the time Nate got home from his wreck, the guys were coming. I didn't even get to talk to him or hug him or anything. We went straight into talking about our house. Then I went to my nephew's program. When I got home, I convinced Nate to go get checked at the hospital. I didn't care that he kept telling me he was fine. I wanted to hear it from a professional.
He was fine and so I could sleep well that night.... well, I thought I was going to. It turns out that since he landed on his left side, that's the side that's bruised and that's the side that's closest to me when we're sleeping. I was so scared of hurting him more.
As the week went on, I saw him walking slower and slower. People would also approach us and make comments about how they're glad he's still alive.
I kept finding out more about the accident. And the more I heard people say "you're lucky" the deeper the pit got in my stomach.
Basically everything that happened last week was magnified by the fact that I almost lost my husband.
There are several more events I'll mention but there are also a few I can't go into detail about. Last week I had four friends also dealing with big things. They all weigh heavy on my heart.
Back to our highlights (or lowlights as they may be)...
Our old dog is having blood in his bowel movements. I was just observing him last weekend and then on Wednesday I got more scared about it. I sent a picture to my daycare mom that works at the vet. On Friday I spent a hour and a half at the vet trying to figure out what's going on. We have no idea and so are trying to make decisions as far as how much do we pay.
Yes, dogs feel like family but we need to remember that he's not human. He's 10 years old. He's old.
He acts fine for the most part so I think we're deciding to just hold off right now. It's so hard trying to make such decisions!
This past weekend we celebrated my older step-son's birthday. So we were busy with making sure he was having a good time with friends. That was fun but a lot harder considering the week's events.
We also found out that my husband's step-sister was in a car accident. She had come over a hill and ran into a planter coming the other direction. (I'm talking like a farm planter!) She didn't have time to take the ditch but she had time to lay down in her vehicle. If she hadn't.... she also wouldn't be here. I don't have a picture to show you but I saw one where a blade cut through her head rest!!!
She has a cut on her jaw but just like Nate, she's okay...
Lucky to be walking and still alive.
As I say that, I have to say, I don't believe in luck. I believe in God. God protected both of them. His hand was definitely in the situations! I praise God everyday that I still have a husband and that his sister is okay as well. It's amazing!!
That has to lead you to think about life and death. At any moment, you or a loved one can be gone. Are you ready? I recently wrote a post about this. You need to make sure you're going to heaven! The ONLY way to get there is through Jesus Christ. He died to SAVE us! We are on our way to hell until we realize we need saved from it. We need to ask Jesus to be our Savior. Believe that He died for you! Surrender your life to Him! (more questions about this please email... delightinlord@hotmail.com)
Was that the end of our week?
I wish.
Thankfully nothing worse happened. But I'd love it if nothing happened at all!!
Saturday we were getting ready to go out to eat for B's birthday. Nate was driving. B had moved the truck out of the way so he could play basketball. It was sitting towards the end of the driveway. Nate forgot about it. He hits the accelerator, van starts beeping at us, Nate can't react fast enough... Yes, we run into the truck. We now have some nice dents in the van. *sigh*
Totally not a huge deal.. especially in light of other accidents of the week. But like I said, everything was magnified BECAUSE of the other accidents. It was one of those moments where you're like "Really? Is this REALLY happening?"
This brings us to Sunday.
Sunday was a turning point for me. And it's also the main reason I decided to blog today.
Sunday morning I could sense that I am not pregnant. I had been trying to keep my hopes down but that's pretty much impossible. I was trying to not even think about it. Of course, if I did think about it, I would become emotional.
We got to church normal time, I make the coffee, Nate gets out the emblems, and then we got ready for first meeting. Ten minutes into it I got into a coughing fit and went downstairs.
I got a drink and sat to see if the tickle in my throat would leave. Of course, just sitting in an empty basement causes a person to start thinking about the week and the fact that I didn't think I was pregnant.
I cried out to God "I can't handle this! I can't handle this week! I can't handle the disappointment!"
He responded.
I felt God say to me, "Why are you trying to? You're absolutely right that you can't handle this. You NEED Me! Lean on Me!"
I, then, could literally picture myself sitting in His very capable hands.
I let go of everything. I let go of all my thoughts, plans, disappointments, etc. Yes, I was emotional but it felt good to realize I didn't need to handle everything. That's not what God wants. God gives us trials to develop our character. Part of that development is realizing that we always NEED Him. In good times and bad. He's always here. He wants us to lean on Him. He'll guide us and help us get through it.
This also led to another thought.
There's things that we feel led by God to do.
I felt led to start selling Norwex. We felt led to build the addition and fix our foundation. We felt led to pursue infertility.
I think that sometimes we feel led to do something and then we start running. We take off with a shot and don't give God another thought. (and I say 'we' meaning all of us! ;))
I picture walking a child to the park. As soon as the park comes into view, they take off. They don't wait for me. They're just excited to get to the park!
We do the same thing! We get so excited for the end goal that we take off and don't wait for God. How can He be leading me if he's not LEADING? If I'm running ahead of Him with my plans, I'm no longer in the following position.
His timing is not our timing. His ways are not our ways.
I ask you...
1. Are you living life hoping you're lucky enough? Or have you given your life to God?
2. Are you trying to handle everything alone? Or are you letting God handle it with you?
3. Are you running ahead of God? Or are you still letting Him lead?
I can't handle it. But God can.
ps.. we had one more event. Nate's step-brother rolled his truck. He is also okay.
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